Friday, April 20, 2012

I Hold My Head Up In the Rain


Ella, what do you have
against taking chances?
I’d be happy to risk
getting what I wish for
if you would only give me one.

Ella, why is it so hard
to have a little patience
I’d move the moon and stars for you
and demand nothing in return

Just one chance and a little bit of patience
doesn’t seem too much to ask
if in a while our paths diverge
as we travel through this yellow wood
at least we could say we tried
going down the road less traveled by

Ella, what do you say
you rethink your final answer?
It’s easy for me to see us
still walking and laughing
a long way over that bright horizon

Ella, is there something
you don’t like
about a guy who treats you right?
I won’t bother to apologize
‘cause I’d be happy to do the same again

Just one chance and a little bit of patience
doesn’t seem too much to ask
if in a while our paths diverge
as we travel through this yellow wood
at least we could say we tried
going down the road less traveled by

Ella, you’re a chance I’d take
if you’d just give me one
Ella, I’d do my best to be
no less than you deserve
if you’d just take a chance on me

Just one chance and a little bit of patience . . .


I haven’t had a chance to get much prose done the last couple of days. That isn’t to say I haven’t been doing creative writing, however. The manager of the web copy team gave me a writing assignment and so I am now working on a project that will actually keep me busy at work. It’s pretty nice so far. I get to make up little poetic lines about products in order to sell them. I technically have until May 21 to write 118 copy blocks so I’m not in any particular rush. I imagine I will have them all done by the end of next week. I wrote about 13 or so yesterday. It is at once the easiest thing I have ever done and still challenging, creative and kind of fun. Especially when the product is an item I wouldn’t give to my grandmother even if I could get it free. In a satirical copy block I sent to a co-worker I described one as “Nothing says ‘hunting’ like this shirt reminiscent of a pheasant on a date with a shotgun.”

As you can see from the lyrics I posted, I still have my date from Monday on my mind. It is about her, to her, but also about dating in general. She is hardly the first woman who I have felt didn’t even bother to give herself a chance to get to know me. It doesn’t help that I don’t really think I’m a very easy person to get to know. I am fairly complex and often feel two separate ways about one thing at the same time. People often can’t tell when I am being serious and when I am being playful or sarcastic either. 

My yoga teacher said something good today that I think I am going to add to the traits I look for in a woman. I told her about what happened and her thought was that sometimes people can’t handle what they don’t feel like they deserve. If someone doesn’t respect or love themselves enough, it can hard to accept too much positive treatment from another. Whether that was the case with Key or not, a woman who is confident enough in herself to want and accept a man who treats her like a person, lady, princess, goddess, and a person again, that’s the kind of woman I want.

Ella, I have decided, is the name of the female character I am going to write my songs to. She is a kind of Everywoman, all the women who have been part of my life, are part of my life, or have yet to be. Her name comes from the German word for ‘all’ as well as sounding very similar to the French word ‘elle’, which means “she, her, herself”. I decided to do this because I really don’t like writing “Hey, girl,” “Woman,” “Lady,” or “Babe” or any form of the word. And I am sure as hell not going to start using “shorty”. So Ella it is. If I ever produced an album I intended to call it Simple Songs, but if I stick with the Ella thing maybe I will call it Songs for Ella instead. M0RG4N, of course, is the name of the “band”.

Random thought. Why did it take me 29 years to bother to put an actual Foo Fighters album on? So freaking good.

Well, between the copy writing, the lyrics, this little thought blurb, and the next little piece, I have achieved my goal. I will leave you with a thought I had this morning as I walked to the building from my car.

I hold my head up in the rain
because I am not afraid.
Let the raindrops drown the sky
for my dreams are built of sturdier things.

And a thousand words, goodnight.

-m0rg4n

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